Pants on the Ground

For some reason, Emilee and I must attract weirdos at the pubs, especially the guys who like to undo their trousers while dancing. The first time we encountered this, Emilee, Claire, Luke (three of my classmates) and I went with the local darts team to Westport. We all ended the night at one of the late pubs, Cozy Joe’s. Emilee, Claire, and I were dancing while Luke talked with our friend Paul. We weren’t by the main dance floor, so we were a bit surprised when this guy came up and started trying to dance with us. And then we realized, his belt was undone and his trousers were unzipped. The trousers were still up where they were supposed to be, but we saw a lot more of his boxer-briefs than any of us cared to. Not knowing what the hell to do, we just stopped and looked to Paul for help. After all, he is a tall guy and can maybe look intimidating if he wanted to (I say maybe because I don’t know that I quite believe that). So what did he do? Got up and mimicked the kid until he got fed up and left.

Paul later told us that dealing with that type of kid is tricky because he’s drunk and talks a big game, but doesn’t have the bullocks to do anything. Merely telling him to f*** off won’t even scratch the surface of his ego. So you’ve got to do strange things to get him to go away, and even that likely won’t last long. And it didn’t. The kid was back trying to dance with us within 20 minutes so we just walked away. None of us had the energy to deal with him.

The second time Emilee and I dealt with someone like that was while we were in Killarney. It was Friday night when we were at the Killarney Grand Hotel. The front half of the Grand is your typical Irish pub that has music every night of the week, but the back half is a nightclub. We were in the nightclub after the band had finished in the front, dancing and having a good craic, when a guy starts dancing with us. Neither Em or I paid him much attention, and a few minutes later, we look over and he’s working on his belt, a mate on either side of him egging him on. Once he gets the belt, he doesn’t just unzip his trousers like the lad over at Cozy Joe’s had, he drops the trousers down to his ankles. Unfortunately Paul wasn’t there to chase the guy off, so we quickly put a few people between us and him, hoping he wouldn’t follow or try to find us later in the night (he didn’t!).

I’m not very familiar with the bar/club scene back home, so I don’t know whether it’s common to see someone dropping trou , but I have a feeling that it’ll happen wherever there are idiots mixed with alcohol.